Dickinson Dees West Tyne League Division 2

Humshaugh II XI v Haltwhistle II XI Sat 20/05/2007

Haltwhistle 2nds fielded a team that was a little younger than Humshaugh’s and their total of 46 was never going to be enough to prevent the home side taking maximum points. It looked possible that some of the smaller cricketers and indeed the sightscreen, scorebox and pavilion, could have been bodily lifted into the air and blown back to the centre of Britain. There is always plenty of hot air in Humshaugh – but this Grecian wind had more force than the post-match analysis.

Haltwhistle were 20 without loss - match sponsored by M A Lynn Agricultural Construction of Belsay - before Andy Elliott bowled the openers with creepers that were kept from bouncing by fearsome cross currents. Jimmy the Moonlight Maughan, fresh from a break on the outer-edges of empire, has cut down his Olympian approach and thereby stabalised take-off and touch-down in most weather conditions. He failed with an appeal first ball and then despatched Graham for a duck. He could have had more, but the mighty winds of zeus eventually interfered with his brake flaps and, generous lad that he is, he left the glory to others after a fine spell.

A procession of Haltwhistle batsmen emerged from the shuddering pavilion, getting gradually smaller as they reduced in age. It wouldn’t have surprised anyone had a cricket helmet with feet made its way down the steps and rolled into the middle, but as it was Chris Heslop and George Craig took three and four wickets each – Craig now 12 wickets from three games - and the hungry youngsters (doesn’t anyone feed these lads?) swarmed off the pitch to investigate the carrot cake and cherry scones.

Little targets like large winds can be problematic, especially when communications  are breaking up. Although Haltwhistle got an early wicket with a fine catch, Tony Gradwell was launching big howitzers back over the bowlers until he tickled one to fine-leg and, looking round for the ball, turned to find Jack Gradwell (no relation) standing silently before him like an air-borne spirit, a look of consternation on his face. Now this is a common problem in all forms of cricket – similar to the ‘yes, no, yes, oh sorry,’ calling system that can leave large holes in dressing room walls. Fortunately stranded batsmen cause compensating panic among fielding sides and there is every chance you will be able to run three or more while the fielders are hurling the ball at each other. ‘You’ve got to talk to me Jack,’ Tony proffered as he accelerated comfortably towards safety – a mild reproof, clearly given.

Gradwell senior finished 31 not out and the Humshaugh elders (combined age approximately 260) retired to the Crown to discuss next year’s cricket tour of Bulgaria. Unfortunately Haltwhistle were all under age, apart from their driver. If the question from partners and parents is, ‘what time did you finish?’ the paperwork vanished and ‘the answer my friend, is blowing in the wind.’

Haltwhistle: 46 (Craig 4-7, Chris Heslop 3-10);
Humshaugh: 49-1 (Tony Gradwell 31 not out)

Humshaugh 12 pts Haltwhistle 0